Ol' Ebeneezer, CEO of the Online Aggregator of Common Creator Content (OACCC), placed the key in the lock of his Manhattan loft and thought "Bah! Humbug!" He still couldn't believe that his assistant, Bob Cratchit, would have the audacity to suggest mounting an online Christmas exhibit that would feature pieces of true art and writing that depicted truth and beauty simply for art's sake!
Bob actually wanted to display pieces in the styles of realism, impressionism, expressionism, and even fiction, simply to worship truth, beauty and enjoyment on this "holy day?"
Who ever heard of such a thing?
Bob actually thought people still cared about that sort of thing.
"It's only once a year, sir!" he audaciously suggested..
"Only once a year!" Ebeneezer sneered, "That's a whole 1/365th of the year and nobody monetizes art for art's sake! The nerve of Cratchit.
No, Ebeneezer thought, we will continue to post clickbait and listicles. That's what the public wants and the proof is in the traffic....and in those glorious advertising dollars. Bah! Humbug! Let's hit them with a popup too!
Ebneezer congratulated himself as he climbed into bed.
"The OACCC community is lucky to have me" he thought, "I mean, what kind of money could we possibly make from content by simply displaying, with no launch or marketing plan, beautiful art with no way to monetize it! What an antiquated idea!"
Ebeneezer chuckled to himself as he climbed into bed, turned off his plasma TV, and said, "Alexa, turn off the lights." "Bah! Humbug!" he thought again as he drifted off to sleep . . .
***
Ebeneeeeeeezer . . . . ., Ebeneeeeeeeeeezer . . . . . wake up!
Ebeneezer awoke and was excited to see the ghostly figure of Twitter influencer, @TedContentGuy in front of him. Tedl! A great master of content in his presence!
"Ted," Ebeneezer began, "I know I must be dreaming, but I'm still excited to see you. What's with the long chains and chests you're dragging behind you? Is that a new course you're about to launch? I would love to set up a call with you to discuss how our Online Aggregator can increase your revenue by 72.3% by giving you more exposure. Did you get my last email? What day next week are you available for a quick call? Here's my Calendly link, bruh."
"Silence!" Ted Content Guy bellowed. "I am the art ghost of Christmas past, I recently passed away, and I've come to warn you before it's too late."
"Do you see these heavy chains?" Ted continued, "These chains represent all the Tweets, blog posts and stock photography I passed off as serious writing and art in my day. All of the content that wasted people's time and money in life, I now carry as a heavy burden in death. I forged my chain, one Tweet, one banal Twitter thread, at a time ... and yours...yours, I'm afraid, is much, much longer Ebeneezer. Oh woe to you, Ebeneezer!"
Ted continued, "Now come with me and see shadows of days gone by .... Christmas 1995"
The scene changed and Ebeneezer was a young man. He was back in college marketing class. The teacher kept rambling on about "getting eyeballs onto your website" and how to "monetize" your work. "Content is King." She kept using that phrase a lot, though Ebeneezer wasn't sure what 'content' was. Was it writing? Was it art? Was it photography?
Half listening, he was thumbing through his art history book, just enthralled by the works he saw. His heroes were Da Vinci, Rembrandt, Titian, Vermeer. Oh! John Singer Sargent just took his breath away ...are they simply 'content' now he wondered?
"Ebeneezer!" the teacher bellowed. "Didn't you hear my question?" "How would you monetize this image of a Starry Night by Van Gogh, if you had rights to this content?"
"I..I...I'm sorry ma'am", the young Ebeneezer stammered, "I guess I just don't understand. I'm sure I'm missing something but isn't something like a Van Gogh painting something one should just experience? For enjoyment's sake? Why should we concern ourselves with "monetizing" it? Should we just enjoy it for its intrinsic beauty?"
"A depiction of beauty? Is that what you think makes something successful, that makes an image successful? It's all about getting online now and online everything is content. Beauty isn't cool, you know what's cool? A billion dollars. I swear Ebeneezer, you'll never make it in the information age."
"I wouldn't try to make money from a piece of art like this."
Gasp! The entire class turned in disbelief. The other students began to laugh and jeer. They made fun of Ebeneezer and wondered how he would ever be successful. How would he ever be taken seriously by the "in" crowd if he didn't "get it?" How could he question authority? How dare he?
Ebeneezer vowed right then and there that he would "get it" more than them all. He would show them! Not only that, he would do anything it took to be commercially successful online, he would understand content better than anyone. He would learn to monetize 'content' better than anyone!
Stay tuned, next issue we present The Art Ghost of Christmas Present....
Until next time,
