Jeanne Obbard
I wanted to be one of those girls
who always has a win to report,
but the truth is, I'm more gifted at envy.

And anyway haven't you grown tired
of my helpfulness by now,
the sweeping sameness of it,
a halo looking for a hook?

When I came here I was convinced
everyone hated me.
Now I know. It's me
who harbors the hate,

singular trespass in an oyster's soft innards.
Every petty fury accrues to me
while people keep assuming
my meekness has no sequelae.

Do I dissipate
into the milk of my extreme
forbearance? Do I luminesce with ire?

I heard Elizabeth Regina ensured every pearl
on the Spanish Main made its way
back to her fingers, her neck;
Oh Gloriana! no shame in her hunger!

I have made myself small, small. And I was told
there would be prizes.
Now I am ravenous
from my long abnegation,

open-mouthed as the dragon sea.


Author's Note:
Pearls were often referred to in the 16th century as both "margaritas" and "seeds."
from the journal  COPPER NICKEL
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"Seed" is from a book-length exploration of unmanageable women of fairy tale and myth. The poem's speaker has retained a certain wildness of spirit despite edicts to be "good"; she has nursed her grievances until she is both scintillant and dangerous. This idea cross-pollinated with the history of pearls as signifiers of political power for women; for example, the apocryphal story of Cleopatra dissolving a valuable pearl in a dish of milk.
 
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