Troops Brutally Troll Putin With App Tracking Russian Deaths

By Shannon Vavra

Ukraine’s military has named the app “Russian ship, go fuck yourself,” in the latest effort to cut through the Kremlin’s lies about Russian casualties in the war.

Amber Heard: Depp Penetrated Me With a Liquor Bottle

By Justin Rohrlich, Mathew Murphy

“I thought this is how I die,” Heard said as she recounted several incidents that allegedly turned violent.

Lin Wood Turns On 2020 Audit Group After It Finds No Fraud

By Kelly Weill

After EchoMail announced it found no fraud during an audit of the 2020 elections in New Mexico’s Otero County, the company’s right-wing allies accused it of “bailing.”

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Irate Fungi Lover Said He’d Skin Robinhood CEO’s Kids: Feds

By Justin Rohrlich

Christopher David Michalski was furious about losing thousands of dollars on the trading app, prosecutors allege.

The Tragic Haunting of Kim K by the Ghost of Marilyn Monroe

By Coleman Spilde

A locket of hair. A sacred dress. But here’s the thing: Kim Kardashian has been baiting this supernatural haunting for years. Let us explain…

How Ashley Nicole Black Became the MVP of TV Comedy

By Kevin Fallon

She writes for all your fave TV shows. (Heard of “Ted Lasso”?) She was nominated against herself at the Emmys. How this Black female writer is blowing up Hollywood expectations.

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Lunar Astronauts Could Turn Moon Soil Into Breathable Air

By Miriam Fauzia

Not your average moon rocks.

GOP Hopeful Suggests He’ll Tear Gas ‘Liberal Media’

By Justin Baragona

“If the media wants to shed some real tears, I can help them out with that,” a smirking Mills says alongside footage of him shooting gas canisters.

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1. Court Docs Say Arbery’s Killer Had 16 Phone Calls With D.A.

 CHATTY 

One of the men convicted of murdering Arbery spoke with his former boss, the local district attorney, by phone in the weeks following the 2020 killing.

2. D.A. Drops Case Against Dave Chappelle’s Alleged Attacker

 NO THANKS 

Sources said that self-styled rapper Isaiah Lee never brandished the replica gun containing a knife blade he was allegedly carrying inside a bag.

3. White House Names Jen Psaki’s Successor as Press Secretary

 NO MORE PSAKI BOMBS 

Psaki, who is reportedly heading to MSNBC for an on-air role, will depart the White House on May 13.

4. Woman Who ‘Melted’ Into Parents’ Couch Vanished 15 Years Ago

 GRISLY DISCOVERY 

“I asked [her father] because I hadn’t seen her for so long,” a neighbor said. Lacey’s father said she was “fine” then “changed the subject.”

5. Man Who Shot Cop’s Mom on Doorstep Thought She Was a ‘Witch’

 UNDER A SPELL 

Reports suggest that suspect Guiseppe Canzani, 41, was a disgruntled customer of tarot card reader Anna Torres, 51, who he thought put a curse on him.

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