Good Morning, Do! Today is Sunday, November 22 Got some devastating news today. House insurance is $1535, and due by Dec 1. And I have not got it. If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! Thank you, Frank!!!!! Thank you, Leonard!!!! Thank you, Clyde!!!! Thank you, Jerry!!! Thank you, Norm!!!! Thank you, Norm!!! Thank you, Carole!!! Thank you, Hermon!! Thank you, betty!! Thank you, Andy!! Thank you, James!! Thank you, Gene!! Thank you, Carl!! Thank you, David! Thank you, James! Thank you, Gary! Thank you, Joseph It warmed my heart to see all those PayPal donations! Thank you very much! DearWebby ___________________________________________________ International Bonehead Award Dopey Couple Wearing Matching "Rick And Morty" Hoodies Arrested On Multiple Gun Charges ____________________________________ Today, November 22 in 1963 U.S. President Kennedy was assassinated while riding in a motorcade in Dallas, TX. Texas Governor John B. Connally was also seriously wounded. Vice-President Lyndon B. Johnson was inaugurated as the 36th U.S. President. _____________________________________________________ Never have children, only grandchildren. --- Gore Vidal (1925 - ) _____________________________________________________ One day this old lady walks into the doctors office and is shown into a room. When the doctor comes in and asks what the problem is she answers, "I have awful gas, but it doesn't bother me. You see, it's completely silent, and doesn't smell at all." So the doctor, after examining her thoroughly gives her some pills and tells her to take one everyday and come back in a week. So the old lady comes back, and when the doctor asks if her problem is any better she replies, "Well I don't know what you gave me but now my gas smells terribly!" The doctor replies "Well now that we've got your sinuses cleared up let's work on your hearing!" _____________________________________________________ Nov/20 - Springbank, AB - Gorgeous Rough-legged Hawk who was willing to pose nicely for me. Doug McQueen ___________________________________________________ A resolution was recently proposed in the UN to form a new union between the Turks and Kurds. This would create a new nation along the Iraq border to be called the Turds. France vetoed the measure citing historical rights to the name. _________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Lauren Clay and Darryl Thompson Glen Burnie, Maryland, USA Dopey Couple Wearing Matching "Rick And Morty" Hoodies Arrested On Multiple Gun Charges The Maryland couple was arrested early today on weapons charges following a traffic stop in Glen Burnie, a Baltimore suburb. According to the Anne Arundel County Police Department, Thompson was behind the wheel of a vehicle pulled over for an equipment violation around 1:40 AM. Clay was in the autos front passenger seat. After detecting the smell of marijuana, cops asked the duo to exit the car. It was at this point that an officer spotted a Ruger 9mm handgun tucked into Clays waistband. During a subsequent search of the vehicle, a second loaded gun--a Ruger outfitted with a Crimson Trace laser sight--was recovered. Clay and Thompson were each charged with four misdemeanor weapons counts, according to court records, which list their joint residence as an apartment located less than a mile from where they were busted. As seen in their mug shots, the defendants appear to be big fans of Rick and Morty, the animated, late-night Cartoon Network series. The shows principal characters are Rick Sanchez, an alcoholic mad scientist, and his grandson, Morty Smith. The hit shows fifth season is expected to start in the next several months. Their Ruger with Laser sight. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Chuck RE: XP machines Hi Webby, You're the guy who thinks XP is so great. Well, I have two old, XP, desktop computers that I don't know what to do with. Can you give me a good suggestion? One boots up but runs rather slow. The other worked the last time I used it a couple years ago, but now it just keeps rebooting. It's like it went bad just sitting in the corner. They're both possibly 10 years old. I'd hate to do something to them without utilizing the XP system by transferring it or whatever. Thanks, Chuck Dear Chuck XP was great, once upon a time, long long ago. Nowadays they are a waste of time. I love W7, but not XP. Try to sell them on eBay or Amazon, preferably to somebody far away, so that they won't expect you to provide tech support. Have FUN! DearWebby | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ The Ten Commandments in Cajun... (Keeps it REAL Simple) 1. God is number one... and das' All. 2. Don't pray to nuthin' or nobody... jus' God. 3. Don't cuss nobody... 'specially da Good Lord. 4. When it be Sunday... pass yo'self by God's House. 5. Yo mama an' yo daddy dun did it all... lissen to dem. 6. Killin' duck an' fish, das' OK... people - No! 7. God done give you a wife... sleep wit' jus' her. 8. Don't take nobody's boat... or nuttin' else. 9. Don't go wantin' somebody's stuff. 10. Stop lyin'... yo tongue gonna fall out yo mouf! ____________________________________________ Laura and Ron had a huge argument and ended up not talking to each other for days. Finally, on the third day, Ron asked where one of his shirts was. "Oh," Laura said, "So now you're speaking to me." Ron looked confused, "What are you talking about?" "Haven't you noticed I haven't spoken to you for three days?" Laura challenged. "No," Ron said, "I just thought we were getting along." ____________________________________________ Anni got hired as a 911 dispatcher is to interrogate callers who are in various states of panic so she can send the appropriate emergency equipment. One day a woman called to say that a family member had fallen and needed to go to a hospital. After finding out where she lived and assuring her that the paramedics would arrive shortly, Anni asked her, "Do you know what caused the fall?" "No," the woman nervously replied. "What?" ________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today November 22 in 1699 A treaty was signed by Denmark, Russia, Saxony and Poland for the partitioning of the Swedish Empire. 1718 English pirate Edward Teach (a.k.a. "Blackbeard") was killed during a battle off the coast of North Carolina. British soldiers cornered him aboard his ship and killed him. He was shot and stabbed more than 25 times. 1899 The Marconi Wireless Company of America was incorporated in New Jersey. 1906 The International Radio Telegraphic Convention in Berlin adopted the SOS distress signal. 1910 Arthur F. Knight patented a steel shaft to replace wood shafts in golf clubs. 1928 In Paris, "Bolero" by Maurice Ravel was first performed publicly. 1935 The first trans-Pacific airmail flight began in Alameda, CA, when the flying boat known as the China Clipper left for Manila. The craft was carrying over 110,000 pieces of mail. 1942 During World War II, the Battle of Stalingrad began. 1943 U.S. President Franklin Roosevelt, British Prime Minister Winston Churchill and Chinese leader Chiang Kai-shek met in Cairo to discuss the measures for defeating Japan. 1963 U.S. President Kennedy was assassinated while riding in a motorcade in Dallas, TX. Texas Governor John B. Connally was also seriously wounded. Vice-President Lyndon B. Johnson was inaugurated as the 36th U.S. President. 1967 The U.N. Security Council approved resolution 242. The resolution called for Israel to withdraw from territories it had captured in 1967 and called on adversaries to recognize Israel's right to exist. 1972 U.S. President Richard M. Nixon lifted a ban on American travel to Cuba. The ban had been put in place on February 8, 1963. 1974 The U.N. General Assembly gave the Palestine Liberation Organization observer status. 1975 Juan Carlos I was proclaimed King of Spain upon the death of Gen. Francisco Franco. 1975 "Dr. Zhivago" appeared on TV for the first time. NBC paid $4 million for the broadcast rights. 1977 Regular passenger service on the Concorde began between New York and Europe. 1983 The Bundestag approved NATO's plan to deploy new U.S. nuclear missiles in West Germany. 1985 Anne Henderson-Pollard was taken into custody a day after her husband Jonathon Jay Pollard was arrested for spying for Israel. 1985 38,648 immigrants became citizens of the United States. It was the largest swearing-in ceremony. 1986 An Iranian surface-to-surface missile hit a residential area in the Iraqi capital of Baghdad, wounding 20 civilians. 1986 Attorney Generel Meese's office discovered a memo in Colonel Oliver North's office that included an amount of money to be sent to the Contras from the profits of weapons sales to Iran. 1986 Mike Tyson became the youngest to wear the world heavyweight- boxing crown. He was only 20 years and 4 months old. 1988 The South African government announced it had joined Cuba and Angola in endorsing a plan to remove Cuban troops from Angola. 1989 Rene Moawad, the president of Lebanon, was assassinated less than three weeks after taking office by a bomb that exploded next to his motorcade in West Beirut. 1990 U.S. President George H.W. Bush, his wife, Barbara, and other congressional leaders shared Thanksgiving dinner with U.S. troops in Saudi Arabia. 1990 British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher announced she would resign. 1993 Mexico's Senate overwhelmingly approved the North American Free Trade Agreement. 1993 American Airlines flight attendants ended their strike that only lasted four days. 1994 Inside the District of Columbia's police headquarters a gunman opened fire. Two FBI agents, a city detective and the gunman were killed in the gun battle. 1994 In northwest Bosnia, Serb fighters set villages on fire in response to retaliatory air strikes by NATO. 1998 CBS's "60 Minutes" aired a tape of Jack Kevorkian giving lethal drugs in an assisted suicide of a terminally ill patient. Kevorkian was later sentenced to 25 years in prison for second- degree murder. 2005 Angela Merkel was elected as Germany's first female chancellor. 2005 Microsoft's XBOX 360 went on sale. 2013 The discovery of Siats meekerorum was announced. The dinosaur skeleton, more than 30 feet long, was found in eastern Utah. 2020 Do smiled. |
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