Item one: An ugly Republican primary? It’s about time!

Donald Trump and Ron DeSantis are laying into each other. Trump makes his juvenile cracks about how to pronounce DeSantis’s name. Dee/DuhSantis counters by calling Trump’s jibes, well, “juvenile,” and had a bus paid for by a super PAC supporting him follow Trump across Iowa, mocking him.

 

Politico calls this “savagery,” or at least a “path of savagery.” That seems a little overstated to me, at least for now, but this is something new, and it’s worth thinking about: The 2024 GOP presidential primary could get mean and brittle in a way no Republican primary has been since … well, let’s think:

 

Since 2020? No, that was just Trump.

 

Since 2016? That race had its moments of bitterness, but the governing dynamic, as you may recall, was that most of the other Republicans refrained from attacking Trump on the assumption that he wouldn’t last and they would gather up his supporters. Marco Rubio notably broke from this mold and lobbed some grenades Trump’s way, but he ended up sounding more like Don Rickles than a candidate for president.

 

Since 2012? There were some tense moments between Mitt Romney and Rick Santorum. But the bottom line was that you never thought Romney was really going to lose.

 

And this is why 2024, just maybe, could be different: There just might be actual drama about the outcome.

 

I know it doesn’t seem that way now. Trump is way ahead. And the more people who join the race—there are seven well-known candidates now (and two no-names), and Chris Christie next week is going to make it eight—the more it favors Trump, because he is presumed to have his 30 percent, which leaves seven people splitting the other 70 percent. Even I can do that math.

 

But just this once let’s play around with this hypothetical. Trump is indicted by Jack Smith. That’ll be indictment number two. Then he is indicted by Fani Willis in Georgia. That’s number three. The conventional wisdom is that this will merely galvanize his supporters, and that’s surely true of many or probably most of them. But all of them?

 

Elections are about percentages. Sweeping statements of conventional wisdom tend to ignore this. Some percentage of Trump’s base will, in fascist fashion, adhere to him all the more loyally, and they’ll buy all the deep-state garbage he dumps into the civic bloodstream. Some percentage will basically stay with him but start to entertain some practical doubts about whether he’s the best person to send into battle. And finally, he’ll lose some percentage.

 

It’s anybody’s guess as to what that number is. But let’s say it’s a quarter of his base. If we’re calling his base 30 percent, that’s 7.5 percent of the electorate. That takes him down closer to 20 percent. That’s a different race.

 

Now throw on top of the indictments the reality that at least two candidates, DeSantis and Christie, will be attacking Trump directly. People tend to roll their eyes about Christie’s candidacy, and eye-rolling is the right response if the question is “Can he win?” But that’s the wrong question. Nobody thinks Christie can win. I very much doubt even Christie thinks he can win. No—he’s getting in to stop Trump. There’s no other rationale.

 

Christie’s track record with respect to Trump is a long way from consistent and admirable, and Fox will have no trouble finding clips of Christie sucking up to Trump. But lately, he’s been a consistent critic. He called Trump “Putin’s puppet.” As USA Today reported this week, Christie is basically going to camp out in New Hampshire, ignoring Iowa and other early states. The idea is obviously to try to convince New Hampshire’s sometimes prickly and unpredictable electorate to turn on Trump and stop him.

 

If that works, and Trump loses New Hampshire, then we have a race. The outcome will actually be in doubt, at least for a while. Christie and DeSantis, and by that time perhaps others, will lay into Trump. This will be new. What will this Trump—thrice indicted, under constant barrage of attack—be like on the campaign trail?

 

There really aren’t any serious fissures in the Republican Party today. It’s an ethnonationalist, anti-democratic, neofascist, anti-freedom party that really only cares about creating a moral panic over certain Americans it finds threatening to its brittle and reactionary righteousness. There’s no serious disagreement about any of that. There are merely people who are gung ho about it, and people who would prefer for various reasons to soft-pedal it. But they’re all on board with the basic program. If they weren’t, they’d nominate a candidate who opposed all that, but there is no chance of that.

 

The only fissure is a tactical one, over Trump. Is he the best field marshal to advance the moral panic? That’s what the 2024 primary will be about. The odds still favor it not being much of a fight. But the Trump-DeSantis pre-savagery this week, combined with Christie’s coming entry, means there’s a chance that all this could get desperately ugly next year. Make that nasty. It will already be ugly.   

 
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Item two: That “Kennedy mystique”

Imagine I told you that Joe Biden is being challenged for the Democratic presidential nomination by a guy who: is famous for his anti-vaccine zealotry; wrote a book called The Real Anthony Fauci; pals around (or at least did so once, which is enough) with Mike Flynn and Roger Stone; and sided this week (in a Fox appearance, no less!) with Elon Musk against the “censorship” being imposed by Joe Biden and the federal government. I could go on in this vein.

 

This candidate, you’d guess, would be polling at about 0.2 percent among loyal Democrats. But slap the name Kennedy on him, and boom, he’s at 20 percent.

 

I encountered him once in person, long, long ago, when he was president of an environmental group called Riverkeeper, which was looking after the welfare of the Hudson River. He held a press conference along Riverside Drive, an event that had the virtue of being about a seven-minute walk from my apartment, so I strolled down.

 

I admit, I fell for it. He was of course 25 or whatever years younger at the time, so he still had that look. You could see his father, jogging along the Hyannis Port sand or citing Aeschylus to soothe the psychically battered crowd that he informed of Martin Luther King Jr.’s death. I can’t have been alone that day in imagining for him a future in elective office, carrying on the legacy.

 

Well, that was then. He’s clearly gone around the bend. But a lot of Democrats don’t know that. And they think Biden is too old, so poof, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. is somehow a contender.

 

The big question is this: Is Biden going to have to debate him? There will be pressure from some quarters, because if RFK is really at 20 percent, that’s a real number (the threshold for general election presidential debates is 15 percent). Team Biden will resist. But maybe they should see it as an opportunity to let people know that even a Kennedy can be bonkers sometimes.

 

We’re 60 years on now from Camelot. We’re even almost 15 years out from Teddy’s death. It seems about time for that Kennedy aura to dim.

 
 

 

Item three: “Ephemeral”

 

In case you weren’t this deep in the weeds on the debt debate, I thought I’d let you know that GOP Representative Andy Biggs of Arizona won the Bad English award this week. Inveighing against the deal on Monday, Biggs said: “I had no idea that we would see a plan as ephemeral and malodorous as this plan.”

 

Look. Democrats misuse words too. This wouldn’t bother me if Biggs weren’t a radical extremist who has associated with right-wing groups and “was seen by the Stop the Steal leaders as an inspiration,” according to The New York Times, and once attended an event where an Oath Keepers leader called for John McCain to be hanged.

 

Biggs represents his state’s 5th congressional district. It’s Republican, but only +11, not in that +30 zone that usually sends people like him to the House. And 2024 could be a really bad year for the Rs, especially if a caged-wolf Trump heads the ticket. Biggs might want to look up “ephemeral” and see what it really means.

 
 

Quiz time!

Last week’s quiz: “Friend only to the undertaker”: To mark Memorial Day, on wars past and present.

 

1. A three-part question: Who fought the Punic Wars? How many were there, and what was the upshot?

A. Rome and Carthage; three; Rome took over vast swaths of northern Africa.
B. Carthage and Egypt; two; Carthage held Alexandria for two centuries.
C. Athens and Sparta; four; the splintering of the Delian League.
D. Assyria and Phrygia; two; Assyrian dominance of Asia Minor.

Answer: A, Rome and Carthage. Carthage was around modern-day Tunis. They were called the Punic Wars because Punicus was the Roman word for Phoenicia, which is modern-day Lebanon. Don’t ask me.

2. According to the Borgen Project, four of history’s seven deadliest wars were fought entirely within the boundaries of which modern-day nation-state?

A. Mexico

B. China

C. Russia

D. India

Answer: B, China. And one of the other three was fought between China and Japan. 

3. The Wars of the Roses were a series of Medieval English civil wars for control of the throne. The “roses” referred to the heraldic badges of the warring factions, which were:

A. The red rose of Windsor and the white rose of Kirkcaldy

B. The yellow rose of Plantagenet and the pink rose of Tudor

C. The white rose of York and the red rose of Lancaster

D. The “Devil’s Rose” of Dorset and the “Angel’s Rose” of Anglia

Answer: C, York vs. Lancaster. All you had to do to know that was watch that one episode of The Beverly Hillbillies.

4. Match the important European battle site to the war.

Jena

Tours

Orléans

Sedan

The Franco-Prussian War

The Hundred Years’ War

The Moorish Conquest of Europe

The Napoleonic Wars

Answer: Jena = Napoleonic Wars, Tours = Moorish Conquest, Orléans = Hundred Years’ Wars, and Sedan = Franco-Prussian War. That was a genuinely hard one. I would think you’d know Jena, partly because of the whole Hegel angle. Not easy beyond that.

5. What’s the deadliest war since World War II?

A. The Iran-Iraq War

B. The Korean War

C. The Vietnam War

D. The Second Congo War

Answer: D, the Second Congo War. Nearly 5.5 million dead from famine, disease, and genocide.

6. How many wars are going on in the world right now, defined as at least 1,000 combat deaths in a recent or current year?

A. 5

B. 9

C. 17

D. 31

Answer: C, 17. We just can’t stop, I guess.

 

 

 

This week’s quiz: June is bustin’ out all over: A quiz about summertime traditions in the United States and beyond.
 

1. What was America’s first vacation hot spot, after the publication of a book in 1869 that sent city dwellers flocking to the region and enthused of it: “No axe has sounded along its mountainsides, or echoed across its peaceful waters … the spruce, hemlock, balsam, and pine ... yield upon the air, and especially at night, all their curative qualities.”

A. The Berkshires

B. The Adirondacks

C. Cape Cod

D. The Poconos

2. The U.S. gives schoolchildren about a 12-week summer break. Which of these European countries offers schoolchildren a longer summer break than the U.S., and which shorter?

A. France

B. The U.K.

C. Spain

D. Poland

3. What characteristic distinguishes the fireflies seen annually in the Great Smoky Mountains of Tennessee in the early weeks of June?

A. Their lights become bright red

B. Their “blink” lasts three minutes

C. They bite humans and are dangerous to be near

D. They synchronize their light emissions and blink in unison

4. This summer blockbuster was the first movie ever to gross more than $100 million in U.S. box office receipts.

A. Star Wars

B. Raiders of the Lost Ark

C. Jaws

D. E.T.

5. According to the lyrics of Mungo Jerry’s classic 1970 single “In the Summertime,” what is the group’s philosophy?

A. Life’s for livin’

B. Life is cheap

C. Life is a party

D. Keep calm and carry on

6. Match the boardwalk treat to its city or area of origin.

Thrasher’s French Fries

Saltwater taffy

Funnel cake

Hot dogs

Coney Island, New York

Pennsylvania Dutch Country

The Jersey Shore

Ocean City, Maryland

Ah, funnel cake! I can’t wait ’til August! Feedback to fightingwords@tnr.com.

 

—Michael Tomasky, editor 

 
 

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