| So… today we talk about regretting something you had no power over. Again, it’s about my dad. My dad is gone. He hasn’t died. But mentally, dementia has taken over and he’s no longer really there. He might recognize me. But there’s no conversation. At first, someone might feel sad that there’s been an emotional severance in a relationship. The truth is, I’ve never felt an emotional connection with my father from his side. There was a lot of emotion from my side. But none from his except when he was angry. I mourn the loss of the chance of a close relationship with my dad. I mourn the loss of “dadhood”. I love my dad. I know he loves (loved?) me. In his own way. But there’s no longer a way to discuss this. Converse about it. Commune in it. He’s gone. What they call the long goodbye. Isn’t it weird when you mourn the loss of something you never had? | 