Good Morning, Do, Today is Monday, September 11 Remember 9/11 ! Have Fun! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Day care workers stop creep from running off with 2 tots. Cops tenderize and arrest him. Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, Sept 11 in 1609 Explorer Henry Hudson sailed into New York harbor and discovered Manhattan Island and the Hudson River. See More of what happened on this day in history. ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
______________________________________________________ The best time to plant an oak tree was twenty-five years ago. The second best time is today. --- James Carville When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul. When you are older, you dream of being the master of your weight and the captain of your bowling team. --- Socratex ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ From deep inside the automobile there came a dreadful curse, A man was trying to fold the map, The way is was at first. _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Ellen for this one: One of my picture frames was broken, and I decided to try my hand at repairing it. A screw was missing in one corner, so I called the hardware store. "Do you carry screws for picture frames?" I asked. "What size do you need?" "I don't know, but it's rather small." The man sighed. "Ma'am, we have 'itsy-bitsy' size screws for a dollar and 49 cents in a package of 10, and we have 'teeny-weeny' size screws , also for a dollar and 49 cents in a package of 10. I can give you a special deal and sell you both packages for two dollars and fifty cents.'" ______________________________________________________ Note the female captain! _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! ______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Calvin Davis, 47, Newark, Delaware Day care workers stop creep from running off with 2 tots. Cops tenderize and arrest him. Day care workers in Delaware stopped a man from walking off with two babies after the stranger shoved his way into the facility and grabbed the infants, state police said Friday. The man rang the front doorbell at Happy Kids Academy in Newark and pushed a worker to get into the facility, police spokesman Sgt. Richard Bratz said. The man went to the infant room, punched another worker in the face, and picked up two infants, putting one under each arm. When the man tried to leave with the babies, one of the workers stood in front of the door to stop him, police said. The other worker went behind the man and grabbed one baby. The first worker then caught the second baby as the child began slipping from the suspect's arm. The suspect ran from the day care, punching a car in the parking lot, Bratz said. State and county police officers saw the man and ordered him to stop walking and show his hands, police said. The man refused to obey the officers' orders, Bratz said, and one officer shot him with a Taser. The man continued to approach the officer, police said, and the officer tripped on a curb and fell backward. The officer again deployed the Taser, authorities said, but the man continued to approach the officer. The officer then hit Davis for a while with a baton, and was able to eventually take him into custody, Bratz said. Calvin Davis, 47, of Newark was taken to a hospital for evaluation. When he is released, Bratz said, Davis will be charged with kidnapping, assault and various other offenses. The mug shot seems to be from previous arrests. The injured officer was taken to a hospital. One of the two babies sustained a minor cut. _________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Chris Re: Mailing photoshop pictures Dear Webby, Good morning and I hope this finds you and yours well. My husband sent me a group of pictures from his laptop at work. It's in Adobe Photoshop files and I can't open the attachment. I get the box with the red X that says it was unable to open the program because 'qt-mt.dll' wasn't found and that I should reinstall it. I'm clueless at this point, can you tell me what that program is and how/where I go to install it. I have downloaded the photoshop, but still it isn't working. Thanks for the jokes, pictures, and teck help. Have a great and safe weekend! Chris Dear Chris Ask hubby to save the files as JPG and then send them again. Have FUN! DearWebby >From James Le Petit Chef | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Pickle Popsicles By SHARON [16 Posts, 34 Comments] These popsicles are made from pickle juice. My grandkids love them. Pour the pickle juice in Popsicle molds, and freeze. The kids love them, and even my pregnant niece loves them. Source: They sell them at my grandson's T-ball games. By branbrumom from Vian, OK ____________________________________________________ | | Puppet sings to Simon - You Make Me Feel Like a Natural Woman, starts at 1:25 |
____________________________________________________ From Obie Dear Webby I really enjoy your Daily Humor Letter, all the good jokes, without having so many four letter words to make a point. The Tech Support, Bonehead Awards are real nice too. I also enjoy the BONUS links a lot. You are doing GREAT. Thanks, Obie ___________________________________________________ | | You Never Know What You'll Find! |
___________________________________________________ A very young couple had just gotten married and decided to spend their honeymoon in a large Manhattan hotel. Showing signs of nervousness the young man approached the check-in desk. "Good evening, sir," said the official behind the desk, favoring the young man with a perceptive wink. "Suite 16?" "Oh, no!" the young man responded quickly. "She's eighteen." | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
____________________________________________________ From the Classified Ads: Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again. Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children. Stock up and save. Limit: one. Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale. 3-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred. Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating. Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00 ____________________________________________________ | Today, Sept 11, in 1297 Scotsman William Wallace defeated the English forces of Sir Hugh de Cressingham at the Battle of Stirling Bridge. 1499 French forces took over Milan, Italy. 1609 Explorer Henry Hudson sailed into New York harbor and discovered Manhattan Island and the Hudson River. 1695 Imperial troops under Eugene of Savoy defeated the Turks at the Battle of Zenta. 1709 An Anglo-Dutch-Austrian force defeated the French in the Battle of Malplaquet. 1714 Spanish and French troops broke into Barcelona and ended Catalonia's sovereignty after 13 months of seige. 1776 A Peace Conference was held between British General Howe and three representatives of the Continental Congress (Benjamin Franklin, John Adams and Edward Rutledge). The conference failed and the American war for independence continued for seven years. 1777 American forces, under General George Washington, were forced to retreat at the Battle of Brandywine Creek by British forces under William Howe. The Stars and Stripes (American flag) were carried for the first time in the battle. 1814 The U.S. fleet defeated a squadron of British ships in the Battle of Lake Champlain, VT. 1842 1,400 Mexican troops captured San Antonio, TX. The Mexicans retreated with prisoners. 1855 The siege of Sevastopol ended when French, British and Piedmontese troops captured the main naval base of the Russian Black fleet in the Crimean War. 1875 "Professor Tidwissel's Burglar Alarm" was featured in the New York Daily Graphic and became the first comic strip to appear in a newspaper. 1877 The first comic-character timepiece was patented by the Waterbury Clock Company. 1883 The mail chute was patented by James Cutler. The new device was first used in the Elwood Building in Rochester, NY. 1897 A ten-week strike of coal workers in Pennsylvania, WV, and Ohio came to an end. The workers won an eight-hour workday, semi-monthly pay, and company stores were abolished. 1910 In Hollywood, the first commercially successful electric bus line opened. 1936 Boulder Dam in Nevada was dedicated by U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt by turning on the dam's first hydroelectric generator. The dam is now called Hoover Dam. 1941 U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt gave orders to attack any German or Italian vessels found in U.S. defensive waters. The U.S. had not officially entered World War II at this time. 1941 In Arlington, VA, the groundbreaking ceremony for the Pentagon took place. 1952 Dr. Charles Hufnagel successfully replaced a diseased aorta valve with an artificial valve made of plastic. 1959 The U.S. Congress passed a bill authorizing the creation of food stamps. 1965 The 1st Cavalry Division (Airmobile) arrived in South Vietnam and was stationed at An Khe. 1974 "Little House On The Prairie" made its television debut. 1977 The Atari 2600 was released. It was originally sold as the Atari VCS. The system was discontinued on January 1, 1992. 1985 A U.S. satellite passed through the tail of the Giacobini-Zinner comet. It was the first on-the-spot sampling of a comet. 1990 U.S. President Bush vowed "Saddam Hussein will fail" while addressing Congress on the Persian Gulf crisis. In the speech Bush spoke of an objective of a new world order "freer from the threat of terror, stronger in the pursuit of justice, and more secure in the quest for peace". 1991 Soviet President Mikhail Gorbachev announced that thousands of troops would be drawn out of Cuba. 1997 Scotland voted to create its own Parliament after 290 years of union with England. 2001 In the U.S., four airliners were hijacked and were intentionally crashed. Two airliners hit the World Trade Center, which collapsed shortly after, in New York City, NY. One airliner hit the Pentagon in Arlington, VA. Another airliner crashed into a field in Pennsylvania. About 3,000 people were killed. 2012 Terrorists attacked the U.S. consulate in Benghazi, Libya. Five Americans were killed and ten others were injured. 2017 Do smiled. |
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